Friday, May 17, 2013

See.. It's not just field day to me..

  A year ago today I woke up at Cook Childrens Hospital.  Clayton had been given overnight chemo and woke up feeling terrible.  This was one of the Post chemo mornings that he was throwing up and crying so loud from his room that the nurse was summoned without the use of the nurse call button.  I remember watching his sweet little bald head leaning over the toilet and praying out loud over him for the nausea to stop.  I knew that after the nausea quit, he was headed across the street for a radiation treatment that would make him feel terrible all over again.  My heart ached... everything in me cried and I am telling you, I hurt like I have never hurt before.  I remember committing to my older kids earlier in the week to drive back to Waco to be with them on field day.  I pried myself away from Clayton and left him in Ft. Worth with my  mother in law who was thrilled to be able to help.  I cried THE WHOLE WAY TO WACO and showed up just in time to watch Cort run in the relays with his class... still crying.
I remember sitting there watching the other kids participate and wondering if Clayton would ever get that chance.  My mind went where no mother wants it to go.  I started looking at the other kids and once again asking God.. out of all of these kids.. Why mine?  I remember being just plum mad that my son was at the hospital fighting for his life instead of enjoying his field day.
     Can I please share with you that today.. A YEAR LATER... not only was my son well and at school, like he has been all spring, but he was playing, running, being competitive.. full of life and energy.  My son was "just one of the kids".  He was sweating, cheering, running, pulling, and laughing.  My son was WELL.
   Today I sat wearing big sunglasses wiping tears from underneath.  So thankful.. beyond words.. that my son is miles away from where he was last year.  You see, for me, today was not just a hot track day where we go watch relays and balls being thrown.  Today was ANOTHER moment that I treasure, appreciate and will be grateful for.  Today was a day that reminds me of the miracle of prayer and healing... a HUGE day of thanksgiving to the Lord for restoring my son to full health.  The Lord promised me Good.. He promised me that Clayton would be good.  I am so beyond thankful that today, as I sat with mascara all over my hands from wiping my eyes...I was able to see first hand that promise from God in a way I never could have imagined last year.  I guess I'm not going to be a normal mom EVER again.  I will always be the mom that cries at the events... just thankful for the day... thankful that my son is "just another kid".. with a testimony.  

Cort's first swim in our new pool after a hot field day

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